Granted! *Waves wand, you now have a pair of blue-footed boobies (they're a kind of bird, get your mind straight), making whatever noises blue-footed boobies make, at your feet*
I wish for a turkey sandwich.
"There is a theory that states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
- Douglas Adams