Author Topic: In the Maiden's Name  (Read 9408 times)

Jonas

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on: May 23, 2011, 02:19:04 PM
Written for kickahaota, who initially requested a story that used the same setting as Four in the Morning. After some hurdles, it was worked out that I would use 'the Dreaming' instead. The Dreaming is a fae world that I've been kicking around for a while, and one that will probably appear in some of my later stories as well. So in addition to a fun little story about trickster's being tricked, consider In the Maiden's Name to be a small preview of things to come.

If you would like to order a comission or propose a trade, please see the following FA journal entry: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2272756/

"Technically speaking, phoenixes are actually pretty flammable." --Donnie


Virmir

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Reply #1 on: May 24, 2011, 08:34:28 PM
Fantastic story.  This is your best yet. Kudos to you. [:)

The gradual mental transformation along with him reverting to his "original" shape after his realization, along with it not really being wish fulfillment at any point but still fitting his character perfectly just flows really well.  Great job!

Luckily you posted this to the TSA list too so I could grab the plain text from there and load it onto my PDA. [;)

[fox] Virmir


Jonas

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Reply #2 on: May 24, 2011, 08:44:03 PM
Fantastic story.  This is your best yet. Kudos to you. [:)

*tailwags*

"Technically speaking, phoenixes are actually pretty flammable." --Donnie


Stormkit

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Reply #3 on: May 26, 2011, 06:46:41 PM
Neat story, but there was something confusing at the end there.... "He would have lost your influence otherwise."

What exactly does that mean? I could understand 'would NOT have' cause of the whole going from dog to coyote thing, but as is... does it mean if he'd been lying he'd have lost the ability to influence people through her presence? Which would be to say... he'd have fallen out of the court or something like that. Only other thing I can think of is that he had some sort of 'aura' on him that proclaimed he was associated with the Maiden.

Of the four elements,
None is predominant.
Of the four seasons,
None lasts forever.


Jonas

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Reply #4 on: May 27, 2011, 06:44:29 AM
That's a typo. The line is supposed to be "He would not have lost your influence otherwise".

"Technically speaking, phoenixes are actually pretty flammable." --Donnie


Stormkit

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Reply #5 on: May 27, 2011, 02:04:27 PM
Yes, that does make more sense.

You come up with some pretty neat story universes. It's neat seeing all these various things you pull from everywhere. Granted I like some better than others, but your stories are usually a treat.

Of the four elements,
None is predominant.
Of the four seasons,
None lasts forever.


Jonas

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Reply #6 on: May 27, 2011, 06:55:36 PM
:D

"Technically speaking, phoenixes are actually pretty flammable." --Donnie


Geo Holms

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Reply #7 on: May 28, 2011, 08:42:26 AM
That is utterly brilliant, dude. You played w/ the setting, mythos, and progression of the character grandly, leaving a grandly spun tale.