Virmirberus Diaries
Day 5
I did not write the first few days because paper and pen is hard to come by here on the other side of the neatherwordly gate. Also there's the issue with the paws. And that I have to share them with the other two.
Fortunately writing this is helping me hone my rarely used levitation skills. I don't think my penmanship is much better this way, though. MK Virmir and Lucile are asleep at the moment, which gives me a brief window to write in private.
MK Virmir (who absolutely hates it when I call him that and insists on just "Virmir" on pain of a fiery bite to my right cheek) is not taking our merger very well, though Lucile and I are in higher spirits. He believes our main goal should be finding out how to separate as quickly as possible, and frequently punctuates his point by jerking us to the right, often slamming us into walls and such. Lucile is more concerned with finding a way out of the neatherworld first. I can't really blame either of them-- I'm sort of in the middle.
Control was very awkward the first few days while we were figuring out how to share. All three of us have control of and can feel every part of our shared body up to our necks-- our individual heads are our only unique parts. This of course caused much embarrassed tumbling as one of us tried to control one limb, and another another limb, etc. We finally decided that Lucile gets to control the body in the mornings, I get the afternoons, and MK Virmir gets the evenings. Walking has become much easier. But MK Virmir still cheats and trips us up sometimes when he gets angry.
The netherworld isn't as bad a place as I originally thought. It is nice and warm here. The brimstone does smell a bit, though, and sometimes there is irksome wailing from what the three of us have dubbed netherworldly spirits (none of us believe in ghosts). MK Virmir makes us chase them and then tells them to stop, and they shut right up. They are afraid of him.
Day 6
Today we found a giant fire river. There was a charming ferry man dropping off some zombie-people when we arrived who wore a black robe and spoke in capital letters. He told us he could take us to the other side, but we would need to pay our way. This was unfortunate because none of our money teleported through the gate. Phooey.
The three of use came to an agreement that the other side was probably the way out. MK Virmir was so angry he wanted to swim across, and it took all of my and Lucile's power to hold us back. We tried to explain to him that swimming a river made of fire would probably melt our flesh off. He said that we might as well do it and become a three headed skeletal monster, because we're already freaks and we might as well go all the way. I don't think I agree with him.
Day 7
Today a man in a red cape and a pitchfork offered us a job guarding a gate by the fire river. We were inclined to accept, since we need some money to pay the ferryman to cross the river. He was very insistent that we sign his contract, but none of the three of us are terribly keen on full time employment. He tried to tell us there were great benefits being a full time mythical guardian (including health insurance and a 401k), but we're used to consultant work, so told him we would keep track of our hours and send him an invoice every Friday.
The job itself is very easy. All we have to do is lay luxuriously in front of the gate and not let anyone out. Everyone can come inside as they please. Lucile likes to smile and wave at the people coming in. They don't look all that happy.
Some of the imp-guards like to give us ear-scritches when their shift changes, but MK Virmir nearly ripped one of their throats out, so now they are terrified of us. Phooey.
