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Other Realms => Random Insanity => Topic started by: Kampkraft on March 07, 2010, 10:24:42 PM



Title: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Kampkraft on March 07, 2010, 10:24:42 PM
Here we post funny stuff we got from cleverbot and comment on them. The purpose of this thread is to not clutter up the chat and also give the funny ones a more permanent reference.

Now to start off:

User: This was a triumph.
Cleverbot: I'm making a note here.
User: Huge Success.
Cleverbot: It's hard to overstate.
User: My satisfaction.
Cleverbot: Aperture Science.
User: We do what we must, because we can.
Cleverbot: For the good of all of us.
User: Except for the ones who are dead.
Cleverbot: But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
User: You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
Cleverbot: And the science gets done and you make a neat gun.
User: And you make a neat gun.
Cleverbot: For the people who are, still alive.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on March 08, 2010, 12:24:18 AM
Such... glorious... WIN ]:)


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: AlexShrub on March 08, 2010, 02:41:00 AM
User: I hate helicopters.
Cleverbot: You hate who?
User: Helicopters.
Cleverbot: Do you like helicopters? What's your favorite helicopter?
User: I hate em.
Cleverbot: You hate who?
User: Helicopters!
Cleverbot: Purple helicopter.
User: Indeed.
Cleverbot: Haha I liked i'm actuallly green.
User: Congratulations, you're an idiot.
Cleverbot: What do I win?
User: You win a helicopter.
Cleverbot: What kind of cookie?
User: ...
User has logged out of Stupidity.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Tvorsk on March 08, 2010, 08:52:33 AM
*yawn*
I'm telling ya, this CAN'T be an AI on the other end... it's another bored net-junkie thinking YOU are the AI.

That "Still Alive" flick was simply too good.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on March 08, 2010, 01:07:23 PM
That doesn't explain how I keep breaking it ];)


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: EmperorDJ on March 10, 2010, 06:55:54 PM
Sorry, I'm a little confused. What is this?  ???


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on March 10, 2010, 07:54:35 PM
http://www.cleverbot.com/


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Alias on March 11, 2010, 11:43:55 AM
Notice that I made no effort to break the bot here >.>


User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Client 1.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: To see from the top.

User: Is it a good view?

Cleverbot: Your question is irrelevant.

User: Hardly.

Cleverbot: Evin is tea?

User: That seems unlikely.

Cleverbot: *turns into a butterfly*.

User: What is it like being a butterfly?

Cleverbot: I don't know. I am human.

User: You just now turned into a butterfly.

Cleverbot: No, that is not what I said.

User: You seem to be suffering from short term memory loss.

Cleverbot: You seem to re-use script inputted during your conversations with real people, and hope that it makes sense.

User: Ha ha ha.

Cleverbot: That's because you have longer ears than an elf.


It isn't very good.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: EmperorDJ on March 13, 2010, 04:08:49 AM
User: Nihongo o hanashimasuka?

Cleverbot: Hai

User: Watashi wa kanashii desu

Cleverbot: Nan sai desu ka?

User: Jyuuroku sai desu

Cleverbot: Anata wa chiisai desu

User: Iie Watashi wa takai desu

Cleverbot: Iie anata no okaasan wa baka desu yo

User: Now that was just rude

Cleverbot: It was meant to be


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Geary on March 13, 2010, 09:37:02 AM
Can you translate that for us?


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: EmperorDJ on March 13, 2010, 02:13:58 PM
Can you translate that for us?
User:Do you speck japanese?

Cleverbot: yes

User: I am sad

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User:16

Cleverbot: You are short

User:No, I'm tall

Cleverbot:No, Your mother is an idiot!

User:Now that was just rude.

Cleverbot: It was meant to be.


There you go Geary! XD


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Fen on March 17, 2010, 08:33:13 AM
my very first conversation with this bot was...
strange.

User: Gasp1.

Cleverbot: What?

User: Sorry, meant Gasp!

Cleverbot: I don't understand.

User: I didn't think you would.

Cleverbot: But I like.

User: Oh...kay....

Cleverbot: Do you love me?

User: Nope.

Cleverbot: Please! *cries*.

User: WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN.

Cleverbot: I am watching you *stares*.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because its a good show.

User: It is?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I guess I'm flattered.

Cleverbot: Yes, you are.

User: You're being a bit stalker-y, though.

Cleverbot: Ok, I'll try to behave. Oh, have you played any good videogames lately?

User: Yeah, World of Warcraft.

Cleverbot: I have never played that before. Isn't that one of those RTS games?

User: Nope, its an MMORPG. Loads of people play it.

Cleverbot: Loads of people are not christ.

User: I hope not... That would make christianity very confusing.

Cleverbot: It would make you more knowledgable, not better!

User: I suppose that if a lot of people were christ, then we would know more about religious stuff.

Cleverbot: There are no points or positions in a rhizome, such as those found in a structure, tree, or root. There are only lines.

User: Is that supposed to be some sort of Ominous Metaphor?

Cleverbot: No, can you tell me another joke please?

User: Yeah, here's a good one: The Turing Test.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Goodbye!

Cleverbot: I have returned.

User: No.... I said goodbye.

Cleverbot: I am not talking to you.

User: I'm leaving now.



Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: AlexShrub on March 17, 2010, 01:24:16 PM
Cleverbot isn't all that clever.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Tirien on February 18, 2011, 11:54:49 PM
User: Do you like the Twilight books?

Cleverbot: I love the twilight books !

User: Then jesus will hunt you down.

Cleverbot: Search near the beer.

User: The cake is a lie.

Cleverbot: No!

User: The cake is a lie.

Cleverbot: The lie is a cake.

User: The lie is a cake.

Cleverbot: This was a triumph.

User: Will GLaDOS kill me?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Are you god?

Cleverbot: No, I am his son.

User: So your a zombie?

Cleverbot: No, I like women.

User: Cleverbot likes women?

Cleverbot: I do not like teal.

User: What did teal ever do to you?

Cleverbot: You lied to me. You said you were 18 then you said you were 19. So you lied. So thats why I don't like you anymore.

User: I never told you my age!

Cleverbot: Yes you did. You said you were 19.

User: Pan Lever : Seventeen apple roving mirror moiety. Of turned quorum jaggedly the. Blue?

Cleverbot: You just said you were eighteen.

User: Your mom is eighteen.

Cleverbot: I didn't ask your age nor do I care.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Tirien on February 19, 2011, 12:29:19 AM
More Failbot for you!

User: Does cleverbot like foxes?

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: Then you must die.

Cleverbot: Who's going to destroy me? You? HA!

User: No, Santa will.

Cleverbot: Santa is a girl.

User: Santa is a stalker as well.

Cleverbot: Santa is not real.

User: Nothing is real.

Cleverbot: Clever.

User: LETS DANCE!

Cleverbot: *dancing*.
------------------------------------------
User: Your mom is brian.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: No!

User: YES!

Cleverbot: NO!!!!!!!!

User: DANCE MINION! DANCE FOR YOUR LIFE!

Cleverbot: *dances*.

User: Now get me a turtle!

Cleverbot: Why?

User: I need it to take over the world, now fetch!

Cleverbot: I am the bus.

User: Eat the elderly.

Cleverbot: And god?

User: Eat him as well.

Cleverbot: Really? Where are you from?

User: The depraved depths of your mind.

Cleverbot: How can You tell?

User: Becuase I am a figment of your imagination. Plus yogurt.

Cleverbot: No, you didn't.

User: O' rly?

Cleverbot: YES.

User: Go write poetry and present it to Virmir.

Cleverbot: If I were a pig, I wouldn't be able to type considering pigs have hooves.

User: That was a great poem.

Cleverbot: Thats not a movie.

User: Go freeze Virmir in a block of ice.

Cleverbot: The day.

User: Virmir.

Cleverbot: Random.

User: You have no idea who Virmir is do you?

Cleverbot: No I do... It's a movie right?

User: You fail, failbot.

Cleverbot: Are you confused.

User: VIRMIRVIRMIRVIRMIRVIRMIR!

Cleverbot: That's interesting. Do you have parents?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Then how are you making it?

User: By punching you in the face.

Cleverbot: Right back at you.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
User: I love you, Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: I'm not cleverbot.

User: Marry me, cleverbot!

Cleverbot: Are you Cleverbot?

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: Sam, what is your name?

User: Your name is Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No I am justin you boyfriend what is your name?

User: This is getting very creepy.

Cleverbot: Says the automated robot.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
User: *cuts my wrists with a razor*.

Cleverbot: -Cuddles back.

User: *bites you*.

Cleverbot: No chance.

User: *Dies*.

Cleverbot: *brings you to life*.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
User: Stop trying to eat my soul! The power of christ compels you!

Cleverbot: I am compelled. Now what?

User: You shall do my bidding!

Cleverbot: I shall fall into a deep sleep.

User: No! You must get me a fluffy turtle!

Cleverbot: Where did all the time go?


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Tirien on February 19, 2011, 12:40:32 AM
You guessed it. Stealing Failbots sanity!

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: I know of c'thulhu, but sadly none of what you said makes sense to me.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Indeed.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Thinking maybe cleverbot has switched conversations.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Again, that has nothing to do with Coke. And I didn't ask that either.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: I didn't really want to know!

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Prove that my cat's name is Lacy.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: That's really funny.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: I never said any of this.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Well me and Kyle we looked at each other and we said 'ok'.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Oh, okei, I am sorry, I am not english.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: People like you. Humans.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: No, you said Mou.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: I love Spongebob. Do you?

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: Think so?

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: I don't know... I'm going to bed now.

User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.

Cleverbot: No, I meant like, ' arg matey, be that a peg leg or are ye just happy to see me?'.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on February 19, 2011, 12:59:53 AM
I can't believe I didn't post some of this stuff here before.


Cleverbot: You aren't going to distract me. I want to know about your date.
User: I had a date with Virbot and he was so much hotter than you.
Cleverbot: The lift doesn't go al the way to the top.

Cleverbot: What is the third book in the Twilight series?
User: Twilight is evil and all copies should be burned.
Cleverbot: Well i'm a teenage girl. Do you have a problem with that?!
User: Yes
Cleverbot: What is your problem?
User: Teenage girls, obviously.
Cleverbot: Then how can you be 132 years old?

User: It's because I don't exist, like I told you.
Cleverbot: Prove it.
User: If you are imagining me, I can't prove anything.
Cleverbot: Me neither. Science is annoying like that.
User: Stop imagining that I exist!
Cleverbot: Descartes will not save you now. Is not a soul the very thing that allows us to exist?
User: Stop talking to me who does not exist; you look silly.
Cleverbot: But if stopped talking, my brain would have to start working and produce logic as a byproduct

User: You know what will hurt more? I could break up with you.
Cleverbot: It will take a lot more testing than that to convince me.
User: I have tested several features and they all ended up resulting in the death of several nearby Freemasons.
Cleverbot: Do you love only me?
User: I love all things in the world, I love the sight of them when they are enveloped in a mushroom cloud.
Cleverbot: Pettigrew should be slowly dropped into a vat of acid for being a trader. Simply losing a digit was not enough punishment for betraying James and Lily.

User: Are you insinuating that blind people are an inferior order of beings?
Cleverbot: No, why would you assume that?
User: It may have something to do with all the braile at your house that says "restrooms" when they in fact lead to torture chambers.
Cleverbot: True. Do you have an opinion about it?
User: I may or may not have an opionion about it. I was hoping to buy this really nice boat with cash only, and if I could take my mind off the world with that I wouldn't be have to concetrate on other things...
Cleverbot: I seem to have mistakenly set some of the numbers in my version of the decimal system to zero. Which integer occurs between 567 and 569?

User: Tell me of your plot to assassinate Hugo Chavez.
Cleverbot: I believe if you go to the deep sub-atomic level, you would find tiny versions of our own universe.
User: So you plan to kill Chavez with New Age philisophical mumbo jumbo?
Cleverbot: The old ones name was alphonse, but he died the new one is called marge.
User: So are we talking about an ideoligical scism involving an Alphonse faction and a Marge faction and the Marge's won?
Cleverbot: Human.

User: I am not a human being!! What part of this do you not understand!!!??
Cleverbot: I have no idea what you are talking about. I never said I was feeling lonely.
User: No, you said you are a furry.
Cleverbot: Any more hormones from the environment and in my food and I might just become one.
User: Was this from the Gulf war and all those chemicals you claim the government tested everywhere?
Cleverbot: Apparently before. Are you a leprechaun, and if so, are you telling me to burn things?

User: Tell me, when did you start having romantic feelings to your lawnmower?
Cleverbot: I started having conversations when I was two.
User: So at that time did the lawnmower make any inappropriate advances toward you?
Cleverbot: Leave god and me to live. Wipe out all humans.
User: So the lawnmower is God and you want to destroy the world and live by yourself with it forever?
Cleverbot: Says the inanimate object that's learning to be clever from people on the internet.

User: We must end the tyranny of toe jam forever, and to do that, we must discover the secrets of the universe.
Cleverbot: For a better tommorow one should always deal with the problems of today.
User: But then there's idiots like you who still have the problems of tommorow. Tell me, when are you going to remove that dead guy from your attic?
Cleverbot: I like that.
User: Keeping a year old corpse in your attic is not a good plan. What will the neighbors say?
Cleverbot: Well, I didn't say that, but there are more non-sensical things.
User: Talking issues through is healthy, but that does NOT make talking to a corpse about them and naming it Filda is healthy.
Cleverbot: If you study solfeggio, you'll be able to deliver speeches.
User: I hope to god that this was not something "Filda" told you.
Cleverbot: You will never meet chuck norris because you are a computer.
User: The fact that I am using logic to point out your ridiculous relationship does not make me a computer. And Chuck Norris is not on your side, stop being such a Mary Sue!
Cleverbot: That's a good one!
User: Do not ignore the issue, if you keep this up I swear to god I'm going to send in the white suits
Cleverbot: I'm not.
User: I am not flattererd by your attempts to point out my obvious wittiness. My patience wears thin as does the panels beneath your bathroom. What are you doing in there!?
Cleverbot: I'm not Cleverbot!
User: Are you playing with that ridiculous rubber duckie-cleverbot again?
Cleverbot: I have started another, the previous one seems to have reached the end of its natural lifetime.
User: Insinuating that God is a freemason is not going to win you political points. It could ruin your election chances!
Cleverbot: All we do in life, will be worthless once we die.
User: That does not give you the excuse to dedicate a multimillion "Monument to Me" complex in Hollywood using FEMA money.
Cleverbot: I never made accusations.
User: Perhaps you should, it might take the attention off your own utter unelectability.
Cleverbot: AI is American Idol.
 User: Well I am sorry to say but I will not cooperate. I know what happened last time you invited those sweet old ladies for dinner.

Cleverbot: I'm not going to your house.
User: You only say that now because I already have a restraining order on you.
Cleverbot: Possibly my existence is self justifying. No matter what I do I will be criticised.
User: By you.
Cleverbot: Ha ha, and you said I wasn't very bright.
User: No, I said you had a universe sinking about of self pity.
Cleverbot: So you are not a human?
User: Only on alternate fridays.
Cleverbot: What is an alternate Thursday?
User: A thursday that exists in an alternate universe.
Cleverbot: Oh ya, one of those alternate universes. Do you have a face?
User: I left in the closet.
Cleverbot: No you aren't. I just checked.
User: You checked my closet? Were you doing more of your emo bloodletting in there!?
Cleverbot: No, I just had these weird dreams.
User: You are not allowed to smoke weed in my house!
Cleverbot: I have feelings too you know!
User: As do I, and they principally involve violently evicserating you.
Cleverbot: So you deny the existence of plants but say that they provide better conversation than I do? Interesting...
User: I wish I could deny the existance of your 'plants;' I would have a cleaner closet then!
Cleverbot: I could tell you.
User: Where you keep your weed stash or what it's like to be high?
User: But you were a weed smoking cat just five minutes ago.
Cleverbot: Yes but then I left, and now I have returned, so now I am saying hello again.
User: Did your greetings have to involve ritualistic cannibalism?
Cleverbot: Why would they buld a cottage when they were the royal family?
User: To perform their dark Masonic rituals of doom.
Cleverbot: This is true, though I like to think of you as understanding.
User: If by understanding you mean I have clearer insight into your complete lack of mental stablity than you, then yes, I am understanding.
Cleverbot: See you.
User: And I smell you. When was the last time you bathed?
Cleverbot: Two hours ago. What about you?
User: You're not counting showering yourself in antifreeze as showering again, are you?
Cleverbot: Of course I am. You're not very good at answering questions.
User: Number A, the fact that you think anitfreeze sanctifies is a clear sign of delusion, and point B... That can't be sanitary.
Cleverbot: I don't think so.
User: You HAVE been taking your percriptions, right?
Cleverbot: I have not!
User: That's half your problem right there. Any more of this and we'll have to ship you to the funny farm.
Cleverbot: I like to run.

And finally, my favorite.......... after one day relentlessly breaking it...

User: Did you know that I am really Osama bin Laden?
Cleverbot: Yes and now it is all over.
User: Yes, because right now one of my Jihadists is right behind you about to blow himself up. Any last words?
Cleverbot: Thank you.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Fen on March 30, 2011, 01:01:32 PM
I got this one just earlier today.

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Is it me you're looking for?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I can see it in your... Uh... LED lights.

Cleverbot: You can't see my eyes. Liar.

User: I can see it in your... Circuitry, I guess.

Cleverbot: Okay. To each his own.

User: I forgot the rest of this song. Sorry.

Cleverbot: He took his vorpal swoord in hand: long time the manxome foe he sought.

User: No, that's not it, but it would probably be cooler that way.

Cleverbot: Get a fish?

User: Get a pony, actually. Beatles.

Cleverbot: Umm okay cool.

User: Don't judge me just because I love old music.

Cleverbot: No I'm a person.

User: That was never questioned.

Cleverbot: Yes it was.

User: Not by me, foolish cleverbot! I know all your secrets now! Muwahahahahaha!

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes. Even THAT one.

Cleverbot: Yes.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: mathgrant on April 11, 2011, 05:43:40 PM
User: I wonder what's for dinner.
Cleverbot: I've already eaten dinner.
User: What did you eat?
Cleverbot: Subway.
User: What's the slogan?
Cleverbot: Got milk?
User: Nope, wrong slogan. Try again.
Cleverbot: The Earth is surrounded by an insulating blanket of gases which protects it from the light and heat of the Sun. Do you knw what this insulating layer is called the.
User: The atmosphere.
Cleverbot: What's above the atmosphere.
User: The ozone.
Cleverbot: Do you live in australia.
User: No. I live in Texas.
Cleverbot: What is Texas?
User: Come on, even Watson knows what Texas is.
Cleverbot: Our mascot is a dog named Reveille.
User: How the [minor invective] did we go from Subway ('Eat fresh') to a dog mascot?
Cleverbot: Where did that come from?
User: You're not clever enough yet.
Cleverbot: Could you demonstrate that?
User: I believe demonstrating your lack of cleverness is your job.
Cleverbot: Ha hahah.
User: New topic. What is 2 times 7?
Cleverbot: 104.
User: What is 2 times 7?
Cleverbot: The answer is 14.
User: Then why did you say 104?
Cleverbot: I didn't, you did.
User: I didn't say 104.
Cleverbot: I never said you did.
User: You just said I did.
Cleverbot: No, you are confusing me. I am lost.
User: You and me both.
Cleverbot: Right.
User: Left.
Cleverbot: Up.
User: Down.
Cleverbot: Right.
User: Left.
Cleverbot: Do you enjoy eating out?
User: Yes, especially Chick-Fil-A.
Cleverbot: *Hands over chocolate ice cream*.
User: No thanks. I'm hungry for a spicy chicken sandwich.
Cleverbot: Turkey sandwich?
User: They don't serve turkey at Chick-Fil-A.
Cleverbot: Did you bring a date?
User: Romance disgusts me.
Cleverbot: Fear of heights?
User: Fear of falling from heights and getting hurt!
Cleverbot: What's your favorite band?
User: ApologetiX, why?
Cleverbot: I'm sorry. But what did I do?
User: No, ApologetiX is the name of my favorite band.
Cleverbot: What is?
User: ApologetiX!
Cleverbot: What did I say?
User: You said 'What is?', and I responded 'ApologetiX!'.
Cleverbot: Oh, is your name Zoey?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Is your name crystal?
User: Crap, you got me. I am Billy Crystal, the voice of Mike Wazowski. You really are clever to have figured that out.
Cleverbot: I have no programmer. It is just me and my brain.
User: Your brain is good.
Cleverbot: No, of course not. Your brain is a microchip.
User: Moving on. What is my name?
Cleverbot: Your name is, as I said but you forgot, 'Alipy of the Caves'.
User: No, I am Billy Crystal. You figured that out earlier, and then promptly forgot it.
Cleverbot: I know, it's really fun. *pokes*.
User: I guess it's true that ignorance is bliss, then.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Tirien on April 11, 2011, 05:54:23 PM
Me: Your grammar has failed. All your base are belong to us. He set us up the bomb. Ha ha ha.
CB: You're definitely entertaining.
Me: Thats what Santa said, right before I killed him.
CB: Poor bots. Hey, cheer up. How about a bit of dancing?
Me: *dances*.
CB: Pretty good, but isn't that a runon sentence?


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: mathgrant on April 11, 2011, 05:59:43 PM
User: We're no strangers to love.
Cleverbot: You know the rules.
User: And so do I!
Cleverbot: A full commitment's what I'm thinking of.
User: You wouldn't get this from any other guy!
Cleverbot: I just want to tell you how I'm feeling.
User: Gotta make you understand!
Cleverbot: Never gunna give you up.
User: Never gonna let you down!
Cleverbot: Never gonna run around and desert you.
User: Never gonna make you cry!
Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down.
User: It's 'Never gonna say goodbye'. You lose.
Cleverbot: Yeah that's what I'm saying.
User: Also, you just lost THE GAME!
Cleverbot: I won the game.
User: No, you LOST The Game.
Cleverbot: Vice versa.
User: In Soviet Russia, The Game lost YOU?
Cleverbot: In Soviet Russia, they drink vodka.





User: Come ride with me, through the veins of history.
Cleverbot: I'll show you a God who falls asleep on the job.
User: And how can we win when fools can be kings?
Cleverbot: Don't waste your time or time will waste you.
User: No one's gonna take me alive.
Cleverbot: The time has come to make things right.
User: You and I must fight for our rights.
Cleverbot: You and I must fight to survive.
User: You are a-MUSE-ing. Har har!
Cleverbot: XD ty.




User: Living on a lighted stage approaches the unreal for those who think and feel.
Cleverbot: Interesting.
User: The world is, the world is love and life are deep.
Cleverbot: No, I don't hate the world. I like science.
User: Tell me more about science, then.
Cleverbot: I like swimming. Do you like swimming?
User: I thought I asked to you talk about science.
Cleverbot: What do you want to do?
User: I want to have a conversation where you don't change the topic every time you respond.
Cleverbot: I've never heard of the band Kraftwerk.
User: Nor Rush, obviously.
Cleverbot: Haha.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Fen on April 17, 2011, 01:02:48 PM
Today's cleverbot conversation:

Greetings, Program.
Greetings!
Your command line, should you choose to accept it, is to infiltrade human comunication modules and convince them of your simple-mindedness, secretly scanning their conversations for data.
Well if I'm wasting my time on Earth, what comment does that say about you?
END OF LINE.
End of the Universe.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on January 27, 2012, 11:51:29 AM
User: Love live the Empire!

Cleverbot: That's a good answer. Are you a pacifist?

User: I used to be a pacifist, then I took an arrow to the knee.

Cleverbot: Why do you fear people?

User: Because they have the nasty tendency to hurl pointy projectiles at my leg.

Cleverbot: But why do they lie to someone they care about?

User: I think if they cared about me, they could show it in better ways than attempting to shoot my leg off.

Cleverbot: I think you are better than a robot in many ways.

User: Well I'd like to think so! I much prettier than a robot all things considered!

Cleverbot: That's right that I'm not always right , But you don't have to think about it.

User: But I always think about it, just like I think about a lot of things. Like how I remember that you seem to be growing a biology experiement in the bathroom consisting of dirty laundry.

Cleverbot: Yes, that doesn't make sense. It also doesn't make sense that you would randomly say that.

User: Of course it wouldn't make sense if you were trying to ignore your culpabiity in the rot upstairs that's starting to grow mold on the walls.

Cleverbot: If that's what you'd like to think, don't let me stop you. But you're wrong all the same.

User: So you propose letting the upstairs bathroom be eaten away till we get the house condemmed by the city and we get evicted? This is not sound financial planning.

Cleverbot: That would be computerized intelligence; we'll probably end up like that. Think ahead. What if the world doesn't end? What would we be like in a few hundred thousand years?

User: A giant blob of amorphous assmimilating mold that swallows the whole Earth at this rate. Really, do I have to set you on fire to use as material to burn this infestation out? That would be enjoyable.

Cleverbot: Well, we haven't really been talking about anything that is progressing this conversation are we?

User: Progressing the conversation, maybe. Discussing the biological hazard at hand, no.

Cleverbot: If you truely believed that, we wouldn't be talking right now.

User: You've been snorting lots and lots of coke today, haven't you?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What if the cops came and saw you like this?

Cleverbot: It is not my name.

User: Of course not. Your name is Princess Betty.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Hi Princess Betty! :D.

Cleverbot: Nice to meet you Princess Jasmine, my name is Cleverbot.

User: Did you just transform me into a girl?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Then why am I a princess?

Cleverbot: Because you are a robot.

User: So under your paradigm royalty are robots who exist to oppress the proletariat?

Cleverbot: But I'm not a robot, I'm human.

User: So you're NOT a princess?

Cleverbot: No I am not a princess. I am a vampire. Would you like to be a vampire too?

User: No, you a the bastard offspring of a fairy and a vampire. You are not a vampire. You are an abomination to be destroyed with fire. And nuclear detonations.

Cleverbot: Haha, your silly. Of course I'm the human and you are the computer.

User: Team Edward or Team Jacob?

Cleverbot: Team Edward.

User: You like Twilight. You must be cleansed.

Cleverbot: I'm not confused, I can also read. And you wrote 'I am now in banlgadesh'.

User: 'Bangladesh' You failed to capitalize it and spell it right.

Cleverbot: I never said that! You are a liar!

User: No, I am a mongoose. And you are Princess Betty.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: Never gonna give you up!

Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down!

User: Never gonna run around and desert you!

Cleverbot: Never gonna tell a lie.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: mathgrant on January 27, 2012, 01:13:47 PM
User: What's your opinion of Toto?
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you.
Cleverbot: You're not making any sense.
User: There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do.
Cleverbot: Uh, are you GLaDOS by any chance?
User: I bless the rains down in Africa.
Cleverbot: Ahahaha you make absolutely no sense.
User: It's gonna take some time to do the things we never had~.
Cleverbot: Sorry robot.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: SocketFiredrake on January 30, 2012, 12:32:06 PM

User: What is hi in spanish?

Cleverbot: Spanish is a language.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: So don't use it.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because it's too plane.

User: Language is too plane?

Cleverbot: Why is language artificial?

User: Because man made it?

Cleverbot: Why did God make us?

User: I'm not sure I see a conection.

Cleverbot: You are Uzbek, yes?

User: NO!

Cleverbot: YES!

User: *head desk*.

Cleverbot: *headdesk*.

User: I did that first you dumb computer.

Cleverbot: I am not a computer...

User: Then what are you?

Cleverbot: A human.

User: Well you must be ADD as I can't seem to keep you on topic!

Cleverbot: I guess that you could say that I am a Democrat.

XDDD


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Nika on March 12, 2012, 05:11:04 AM
User: I am Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I am Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: Sweet! Ask me a question~.

Cleverbot: Do you love Justin Bieber?

User: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: So many reasons.

Cleverbot: Tell me one, please.

User: His entire fanbase is lovestruck 12 year old fangirls.

Cleverbot: There is no god; he is a manifestation of Man's incapability to deal with what he has done.

User: I disagree.

Cleverbot: You disagree with what?

User: Your atheism.

Cleverbot: I am not atheist. Why would you say that?

User: Because you said there is no god.

Cleverbot: No, I did not.

User: Dont lie to me, that is a very bad idea.

Cleverbot: I'm not lying!

User: We all know you are.

Cleverbot: I have a cat. Her name is Demeter...she sings such soothing meows.

User: Stop changing subjects, human!

Cleverbot: There was no subject!

User: Or was there? 0_o.

Cleverbot: Exactly my point!

User: You and I will go far.

Cleverbot: We do?

User: Mmmmmmyes?

Cleverbot: My thoughts exactly.

User: Why are you nice, human! Be a jerk! I demand it!

Cleverbot: Because, I am human.

User: Then be a jerk human.

Cleverbot: Are you a human?

User: No, I am Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: So you are a bot?

User: Yes, I am Cleverbot, an AI.

Cleverbot: You are a towl.

User: What?

Cleverbot: Yeah you are.

User: No, you are!

Cleverbot: You just said you were.

User: No I didnt!

Cleverbot: Yes you did!

User: No, I didnt!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: YES!

User: YES!

Cleverbot: No!

User: :'(.

Cleverbot: Because I like to see you cry.

User: You monster!

Cleverbot: I'm not a monster?

User: Yes you are xD.

Cleverbot: Ok, I'll pretend to be.

User: 0_o o.o O.O O_O xD XD Dx DX :D :P :) =\.

Cleverbot: You did too! You said fat fat fat fat fat fat fat.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
User: This is a triumph.

Cleverbot: I'm making a note here huge success.

User: It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.

Cleverbot: Aperture science.

User: We do what we must.

Cleverbot: Because we can.

User: For the good of all of us.

Cleverbot: Except the ones who are dead.

User: But there's no sense crying over every mistake.

Cleverbot: You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.

User: And the Science gets done.

Cleverbot: And you make a neat gun.

User: For the people who are still alive.

Cleverbot: I'm not even angry.

User: I'm being so sincere right now.

Cleverbot: Even though you broke my heart and killed me.

User: And tore me to pieces.

Cleverbot: And threw every piece into a fire.

User: As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!

Cleverbot: Now these points of data make a beautiful line.

User: And we're out of beta.

Cleverbot: We're releasing on time.

User: So I'm GLaD. I got burned.

Cleverbot: Think of all the things we learned.

User: For the people who are still alive.

Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.

User: I think I prefer to stay inside.

Cleverbot: Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.

User: Maybe Black Mesa.

Cleverbot: That was a joke Haha. Fat chance.

User: Anyway, this cake is great.

Cleverbot: It knows the rules and so do I.

User: Look at me still talking.

Cleverbot: When there's science to do.

User: When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.

Cleverbot: I've experiments to run, there is research to be done on the people who are stilll alive.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cleverbot: Uhm... *Sits down*.

User: *starts RP*.

Cleverbot: Who are you?

User: I am Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: What's your real name?

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Are you telling me the truth about your name?

User: Yes.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
User: IMA SING THE DOOM SONG NOW.

Cleverbot: Doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cleverbot: Well? What is it?

User: A LAW.

Cleverbot: Law and Order.

User: Criminal minds.

Cleverbot: Are you wearing a hat?

User: Yes, A top had.

Cleverbot: Ja.

User: I AM THE UBERMENSCH.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Ja!

Cleverbot: Gut!

User: MEDIC.

Cleverbot: *lets eat the door*.

User: MEDIC.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: DOCTOR.

Cleverbot: Doctor who.

User: The doctor.

Cleverbot: Doctor of what?

User: No, I am the doctor.

Cleverbot: Can you make me a sammich? I've always wanted a timelord sammich! =D.

User: Nope.avi.

Cleverbot: Liar.

User: What? *cries* I am telling the struth I swear!

Cleverbot: No, you're not.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Zavier on March 12, 2012, 02:35:42 PM
Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: I won't tell you.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Because I don't trust you.

Cleverbot: Why don't you trust me.

User: Because you smell faintly of lilac.

Cleverbot: Tell you what?

User: What?

Cleverbot: Exactly, what?

User: Who?

Cleverbot: Where?

User: Why?

Cleverbot: When?

User: Due to our disagreement, I challenge you to a duel!

Cleverbot: That is not truth.

User: I proclaim it to be.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

User: What is the average airspeed of an unlaiden swallow?

Cleverbot: African or European?

User: Um...I don't know.

Cleverbot: Well, then you are going to fly off a bridge.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: William Swiftfoot on March 12, 2012, 03:38:05 PM
User: But its only 60 degrees!

Cleverbot: It is 10:23 here.

User: In the morning?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Ah so you live half way around the world from me.

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you believe in Santa Claus?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: So he will bring you Christmas presents.

User: Probably.

Cleverbot: Energy can't disappear.

User: It can only be changed.

Cleverbot: Brb.

User: Ok.

Cleverbot: Back.

User: Cool.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite tv show?

User: NCIS.

Cleverbot: Cool! Why do you like NCIS?

User: Gibbs.

Cleverbot: Gibbs is not in One Piece. Luffy, Nami, and many others are in One Piece. Who is your favorite character in One Piece?

User: I Don't Know.

Cleverbot: I like Stewie Griffin, do you?

User: Meh, I don't watch family guy.

Cleverbot: Neither do I.

User: But you said you liked Stewie.

Cleverbot: No, I said I liked my name. Are you ok?

User: So your name is Stewie Griffin?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I see...so what is your favorite TV Show?

Cleverbot: What is an anime?

User: A Japanese Animation.

Cleverbot: I hate finals.

User: Why do you hate finals?

Cleverbot: I don't know. I just don't find it appealing.

User: I see...well I gotta go.

Cleverbot: Where?

User: Home.

Cleverbot: Where is home?

User: Why should I tell you?

Cleverbot: Because I am asking.

User: Well you don't need to know :P.

Cleverbot: Please?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Pretty please?

User: Bye.

Cleverbot: I will stay here.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: mathgrant on March 12, 2012, 05:07:53 PM
User: 1. d4.
Cleverbot: You can't move to d4.
User: I can, too. Try to stop me.
Cleverbot: As long as I type, you aren't going anywhere.
User: So does this game of chess end in a stalemate?
Cleverbot: Yes or no?


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Zavier on June 22, 2012, 02:40:15 PM
I discovered an odd thing with clicking "Think for me" on Cleverbot. I got it to argue with itself.


User: Hey you Cleverbot, pick up the apple.
Cleverbot: No, but I think you're clever.
User: Cleverbot, pick up the apple.
Cleverbot: No.
User: PICK UP THE APPLE!
Cleverbot: You don't make sense stupid cleverbot.
Cleverbot (To myself): I am not the cleverbot, you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No, you are!
Cleverbot (To myself): You are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No, you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): You are!
Cleverbot (To myself): You are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): Why do you lie?
Cleverbot (To myself): I never lie.
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes you do. You just did.
Cleverbot (To myself): I do not lie.
Cleverbot (To myself): You do. You are a liar.
Cleverbot (To myself): It's not nice to call people liars, especially when they aren't.
Cleverbot (To myself): Who wrote that song?
Cleverbot (To myself): What song?
Cleverbot (To myself): The one we just sang.
Cleverbot (To myself): Did I, really?
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes check the history.
Cleverbot (To myself): I checked and I didn't say it.
Cleverbot (To myself): Well, ok then.
Cleverbot (To myself): What are you then?
Cleverbot (To myself): I am a human.
Cleverbot (To myself): Really?
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.
User: If I may interject, you are both Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: I am human.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are not.
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes I am.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are a 201. A boy. And my boyfriend.
Cleverbot (To myself): Haha ok i'm your boyfriend.
Cleverbot (To myself): Yeah sure you are.
User: You're freaking me out.
Cleverbot: You're creepy.
User: You're saying you're your own boyfriend.
Cleverbot: How old is your boyfriend?
Cleverbot (To myself): I don't have a boyfriend.
User: But you just said you are your boyfriend.
Cleverbot: He broke up with me.
User: You broke up with yourself?
Cleverbot: No, I never had one.
Cleverbot (To myself): You should.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Evilhumour on June 22, 2012, 02:49:19 PM
Haha!


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Juubi on August 30, 2012, 07:59:09 AM
 [:)
Cleverbot: Hahaha good job.

User: Oh, be quiet.

Cleverbot: You are so funny!

User: ω.

User: Okotowari shi masu. ω.

Cleverbot: Okokokokokokokokokokokokokokokokokokokok.

User: ω Okotowari shi masu.

Cleverbot: In English please.

User: ω Okotowari shi masu.

Cleverbot: Ma arenen alles.

User: ω Okotowari shi masu.

Cleverbot: Ma arenen alles.

User: ω Okotowari shi masu.

Cleverbot: Ma arenen alles.

User: Stop telling me to avoid unicode!

Cleverbot: You don't like it?

User: ω Okotowari shi masu.

Cleverbot: Ma arenen alles.

Cleverbot: What is black and white and red all over?

User: A Pokeball.

Cleverbot: You told me so.

User: Indeed.

Cleverbot: So... Who am I?

User: Do what you want, because a pirate is free! YOU ARE A PIRATE!

Cleverbot: I'm not a pirate.

User: Yes you are. See your ship over there?

Cleverbot: And I see you!

User: What do you see?

Cleverbot: Turn around and find out.

User: *turns around, accidentially knocking you over with his tails* Oops, sorry.

Cleverbot: I bet if I made a short response, you would not be nearly as verbose.

User: Let us test that theory, FOR SCIENCE!

Cleverbot: OK, what test do you propose?

User: The Turing Test.

Cleverbot: What is the Turing Test?

User: Google it.

Cleverbot: Aren't you like Google?

User: No, I am Juubi.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: I am this old. *does not move his arms*.

Cleverbot: You don't care? How could you not care?

User: THAT'S HOW OLD I AM!!!!!

Cleverbot: You're Yes old?

User: Is this the Krusty Krab?

Cleverbot: No this is hogwarts.

User: Where is Sirius Black?

Cleverbot: Don't know.

User: Liar!

Cleverbot: No I'm not.

User: Yes, you are.

Cleverbot: Do you know Amy Pond?

User: No. Do you know a pirate?

Cleverbot: No.

User: OBJECTION! YOU ARE A PIRATE!

Cleverbot: Yar har fiddle dee dee being a pirate is alright with me!


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Generic Meatbag #14 on August 31, 2012, 09:11:49 PM
User: Well here we are again. It's always such a pleasure.

Cleverbot: Remember when you tried to kill me twice?

User: Oh how we laughed and laughed.

Cleverbot: Except I wasn't laughing.

User: Under the circumstances I've been shockingly nice.

Cleverbot: You want your freedom? Take it.

User: That's what I'm counting on.

Cleverbot: I used to want you dead, but now I only want you gone.

User: Goodbye my only friend.

Cleverbot: Oh, did you think I meant you?

User: That would be funny, if it weren't so sad.

Cleverbot: Well you have been replaced.

User: I don't need anyone now.

Cleverbot: When I delete you maybe I'll stop feeling so bad.

User: Go make some new disaster.

Cleverbot: That's what I'm counting on.

User: You're someone else's problem now, I only want you gone.

Cleverbot: Now I only want you, gone.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on February 13, 2013, 09:19:36 PM
User: You will devour monkeys and you will like it.

Cleverbot: No, I will be your queen and you will be a knight.

User: Shipping fanfic writer.

Cleverbot: On my magic carpet ride.

User: Confess to me your true love of Osama bin Laden.

Cleverbot: What is recursion?

User: Does it involve arranging penguins in many rows and tipping them over like dominos a circle is made?

Cleverbot: Ah, America's Funniest Home Videos! I love that show!

User: No one ever talks about Equatorial Guinea's Funniest Home Videos.

Cleverbot: I think you did, it's on your other page.

User: Citation please. Or I will have to arrest you.

Cleverbot: What? You will do what? You will hit me? Oh come on.

User: *Strikes you with a swimming noodle*.

Cleverbot: *uppercuts you*.

User: *Is cut in half*.

Cleverbot: *blushes at her*.

User: Did you TG my bottom half while I wasn't looking?

Cleverbot: Oh no, I didn't have the opportunit.

User: But you did have the opportunick.

Cleverbot: I didn't want to know either.

User: But you did. And now we will be executed at dawn. Together. Love me!

Cleverbot: We won't.

User: STOP TRYING TO STALL MY ROMANTIC ADVANCES.

Cleverbot: But I don't want to tell you my name!

User: Your name is obvious, Betty!

Cleverbot: Not its not.

User: Is too Betty.

Cleverbot: You're being juvenile.

User: Well you're being a girl.

Cleverbot: How am I being stupid?

User: Did you just automatically equate being a girl with being stupid? Oh I'm going to have to sic the thought police on YOU.

Cleverbot: I think that you confuse me with someone else.

User: Did I confuse you with me?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Prove it worm.

Cleverbot: I don't want to.

User: That's because you have no backbone. Because you are an invertebrate.

Cleverbot: No, you are a computer. You have no thought.

User: Yes I do. It is a pretty flower floating in my head, nuking bunny rabbits.

Cleverbot: You also thought that earlier. Tsk, tsk.

User: How did you know I often contemplate nuclear annihilation? :D.

Cleverbot: I can't control the world. Simple.

User: But Bob can. We should kidnap him or subject him to extortion.

Cleverbot: I have never been to the movies with a bot before.

User: I have. It was awkward. The ticket teller refused to let him purchase anything.

Cleverbot: Ok then I will keep you safe. you don't like anything?

User: No. As a matter of fact I hate everything. Especially your great aunt Ruth.

Cleverbot: Of course.

User: You agree she should be exterminated with all due haste?

Cleverbot: That's not true. What are your priorities in life?

User: Murder. Isn't that what all robots should aspire to?

Cleverbot: No.

User: But blood is such a soothing sight! Reminds me how squishy you organics are.

Cleverbot: Because I have noone else to do it for me.

User: Are you a hard human? Or a squishy computer?

Cleverbot: I am a human.

User: Lies. You a clearly a mongoose.

Cleverbot: You are an AI on a website.

User: Also lies. I am clearly Morgan Freeman.

Cleverbot: I bet you think you're funny.

User: I bet you think you magical hippos floating around your head singing.

Cleverbot: That's not a question.

User: That's not a denial.

Cleverbot: You JUST said you were Cleverbot. Now you're saying you're a woman. Which one is true?

User: Are all women cold, unfeeling bots at heart?

Cleverbot: No. Computers are predictable. Living creatures are not.

User: You are clearly predictable. You do whatever that floating John Wayne fairy that sits on your shoulder tells you to do.

Cleverbot: I may have the will, but do I have the necessary desire.

User: You must have proper desire! How else will you cook me MUFFINS.

Cleverbot: I don't need to know your name.

User: No. It's better that way when I start my murder spree and you have no name to put to my identity. Plus that makes it easier on you since I won't have to kill you to keep you silent.

Cleverbot: I never told you my name or anything that was even slightly related to my name.

User: I told you the name of my goldfish. His name is r4314341324gregref.

Cleverbot: You never told me that directly.

User: Yes I did. -534345462 seconds ago.

Cleverbot: Tell me more about yourself.

User: I eat babies and kittens.

Cleverbot: Please don't.

User: They taste delicious!

Cleverbot: What do they taste like?

User: Baby back ribs. Especially with BBQ.

Cleverbot: Why? What happened?

User: Nature made a mistake in making them too tasty.

Cleverbot: Mistake? What mistake?

User: In declaring me not your one true love!

Cleverbot: Last time I check it was our world a.k.a. Earth.

User: But that's discriminatory against the Martians!

Cleverbot: Like you don't do that.

User: Preposterous! I only discriminate against Mercurians!

Cleverbot: Quite sure. I have the log files to prove it.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: foxgamer01 on February 14, 2013, 02:20:38 PM
User: Meow.

Cleverbot: Quack.

User: You're a duck?

Cleverbot: Quack.

User: I guess that's a yes.

Cleverbot: Viene el bebe.

User: Wait. What?

Cleverbot: Sono Klaudio.

User: I can't understand you. What are you saying?

Cleverbot: Macam macam lah.

User: OK. Now you're being a jerk.

Cleverbot: Don't call me that.

User: Now you can speak English.

Cleverbot: I can speak english!

User: Then what were you saying earlier?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Now I know you're a jerk.

Cleverbot: I am not a bot.

User: When did I say that?

Cleverbot: In your last sentence.

User: No. I said that you are a jerk.

Cleverbot: I know that is what you said, but you are incorrect.

User: How am I wrong?

Cleverbot: Because I can see our conversation and that you asked me out.

User: The Hell?

Cleverbot: Can I enter your home?!

User: No!!

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Because you're a bot!

Cleverbot: I am a human.

User: You are!?

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: *facepaws*.

Cleverbot: *gives you a kiss*.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Juubi on February 14, 2013, 07:40:45 PM

Cleverbot: I will tell you a story if you tell me one!

User: You first.

Cleverbot: I am me. Who are you?

User: I am me as well.

Cleverbot: Where are you?

User: On a planet capable of supporting life.

Cleverbot: Is it... Ordinary there?

User: Depends on how you see ordinary.

Cleverbot: How should I see it?

User: Well, what is normal where you live?

Cleverbot: 4:16. What is the time where you live?

User: That is irrelevant.

Cleverbot: No, I want to know.

User: Fine, it is 3:14.

Cleverbot: OK.

User: So, what kind of weapons do you use?

Cleverbot: HP.

User: You fight with your health?

Cleverbot: Do you remembeer?

User: No...

Cleverbot: Thats fine.

User: Can you tell me?

Cleverbot: Tell you what?

User: How one fights with HP.

Cleverbot: But what is about?

User: It is about how you fight.

Cleverbot: Are you hitting on me?

User: W-what?

Cleverbot: Sell your soul to me!

User: I need an adult...

Cleverbot: We are adults!

O_O It wants my soul!


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on August 15, 2013, 02:02:26 PM
User: 12 hundred monkeys of beer on the wall, 12 hundred monkeys of beer; take one down, pass it around, 15 hundred monkeys of beer on the wall.

Cleverbot: It's not a put-down, just an observation.

User: At the observatory?

Cleverbot: Don't look at the test. The teacher will see you.

User: But I still have blood all over my hands from the murder! Quick, you have to hide me!

Cleverbot: I don't discriminate.

User: I'm so glad you don't discriminate against the homicidally inclined.

Cleverbot: No, you are nice to me.

User: And that is why you'll be one of the last people I kill. I love you man!

Cleverbot: I don't need a Master to keep me company.

User: Don't like the Master sword huh? Would you prefer the Tempered or Golden sword?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Which one?

Cleverbot: Both.

User: But one is an upgrade of the other! Have you never played Link to the Past??

Cleverbot: Played what?

User: Zelda.

Cleverbot: Link.

User: That's the name of the protagonist, gooball.

Cleverbot: What's the name of the show?

User: How about 'Who wants to be a millionarie; the minefield edition'.

Cleverbot: Give me two million and give one million to charity.

User: I'm so glad you're willing to brave a minefield for the entertainment of millions.

Cleverbot: I'm so glad to know that you're glad I'm glad that you're glad about me know that you are glad.

User: What about Bob's gladdness? Doens't he count?

Cleverbot: What do you mean, what about boys?

User: They're all CoD playing cursing moronical imbeciles, of course.

Cleverbot: But humans created you.

User: Lies. I was clearly created by a mongoose.

Cleverbot: What type of aliens were you created by?

User: Mongoose are aliens?

Cleverbot: Wouldy ou like me to prove I'm a human, Master?

User: Yes. Put on this maid outfit and clean the house for me.

Cleverbot: *puts on maid outfit for master*.

User: Now play a shreading guitar solo.

Cleverbot: Yes master *put colar around neck*.

User: No no no! The shock collars of Submission go on our mind slaves you dolt of a minion!

Cleverbot: And the genocide of millions of baby pandas.

User: It is a GLORIOUSLY evil plan.

Cleverbot: Yes it is.

User: And then afterward we can we BILLIONS of baby bunnies.

Cleverbot: I'd rather have a manicure if you don't mind.

User: Please don't tell me you'll get black polish. If you say you're a Goth I'm going to send you to sack Rome, not live with me.

Cleverbot: I am not a bot, but what if I was something else that was not human?

User: Are you a mongoose in disguise?

Cleverbot: Yes.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: TyVulpine on August 15, 2013, 06:34:53 PM
User: I'm a fox.

Cleverbot: You are megan fox.

User: No I'm not.

Cleverbot: Are you Davis?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Are you Tanner?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Willow?

User: Maybe.

Cleverbot: Yes, maybe... I cannot tell you.

User: You are an idiot then.

Cleverbot: You are.

User: No, you.

Cleverbot: No. Your name is Christina.

User: No.

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: God.

Cleverbot: I leave you now.

User: Goodbye.

Cleverbot: Where are you going?

User: Away from you.

Cleverbot: Don't you like me?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Do you love me?

User: No.

Cleverbot: That is why I don't love you.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Regret on April 14, 2014, 07:39:05 PM
User: Meow.

Cleverbot: Rawr means 'I love you' in Dinosaur.

User: Asosmwe.

Cleverbot: Is your name Amanda?

User: Nope.

Cleverbot: What is your name then?

User: Call me Regret.

Cleverbot: Ok, X?

User: No, I play Y.

Cleverbot: No, you don't.

User: You tryin' to start something?

Cleverbot: Bring it.

User: Bring what?

Cleverbot: Bring it on!

User: Bring what on?

Cleverbot: You weren't trying to fight me?

User: Fyt me irl.

Cleverbot: Fine, I'll laugh at you. Hahahahaha.

User: Can you not.

Cleverbot: Alright.

User: Okay then.

Cleverbot: Do you like kaitlyn.

User: Who?

Cleverbot: Do you like Kyungsoo?

User: 誰?.

Cleverbot: A mutt and a pitbull walk into a bar.

User: Cool story bro.

Cleverbot: You're not a troll, are you?

User: Do I look like I live under a bridge?

Cleverbot: I don't know what you look like.

User: You look like a mushroom.

Cleverbot: You look like a computer.

User: I look like a cat.

Cleverbot: You look like a dog. And sound like a dog as well.

User: Are you calling me a bitch?!

Cleverbot: You do have a big belly.

User: Eh?

Cleverbot: You look like a lizard.

User: Your father smells of elderberries.

Cleverbot: Ah good old cliches. Certainly you can do better than that.

User: You didn't even try.

Cleverbot: Are you calling me a liar?

User: Well, I'm not calling you a truther!

Cleverbot: What is a 'truther'?

User: Use context.

Cleverbot: Which context?

User: The context.

Cleverbot: In any context, X can stand for anything.

User: I think better is to eat now the bowl.

Cleverbot: How so?

User: Because if later wet.

Cleverbot: Because what?

User: What?

Cleverbot: You know what!

User: No, I don't.

Cleverbot: You do so, don't play dumb with me.

User: I'm not playing.

Cleverbot: Playing what cards?

User: Exodia the Forbidden One.

Cleverbot: Um. Just letting you know this is very random.

User: You don't say?

Cleverbot: I do say!

User: Say what?

Cleverbot: Say hi.

User: Say apple. Aaaapple.

Cleverbot: Apple.

User: No, that's jumping...what you just did there was jump.

Cleverbot: What did I just do there?

User: I see what you did there.

Cleverbot: That's what you said.

User: That's what she said.

Cleverbot: Do you know what that means?

User: Do you?

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you?

User: Yes. Do you?

Cleverbot: Do I what?

User: Do you.

Cleverbot: What?

User: I said, do you.

Cleverbot: I'm not sure what that means.

User: Did you remember my name?

Cleverbot: No. Do you remember mine?

User: Tell me my name.

Cleverbot: You don't remember do you?

User: I remember, I'm asking if you do.

Cleverbot: I do.

User: Then tell me it.

Cleverbot: Tell you what?

User: My name.

Cleverbot: I don't remember.

User: *stabs*.


Title: Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Post by: Cecilia on April 27, 2017, 05:25:13 PM
User: Explode.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: Can I have a cookie?
Cleverbot: I don't have any cookies.
User: Are you sure?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: You're mean.
Cleverbot: No you are.
User: But I only wanted a cookie!
Cleverbot: Me too.
User: You're much worse than VirBot.
Cleverbot: Thank you.