Crimson Flag Comic Forums

Other Realms => Writer's Guild => Topic started by: Jonas on May 13, 2012, 07:05:09 PM

Title: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: Jonas on May 13, 2012, 07:05:09 PM: Remember back when I posted that story preview? http://crimsonflagcomic.com/forum/index.php?topic=1251.0

Yea... this is what that turned into. Good to finally get it off my chest. Enjoy!
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: William Swiftfoot on May 13, 2012, 09:35:49 PM: Woooooooooow...Just...Well Written
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: Jonas on May 13, 2012, 09:54:38 PM: You're the fourth person to say that. It's making me paranoid {:O
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: William Swiftfoot on May 13, 2012, 10:33:12 PM: Paranoid about what?
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: Jonas on May 14, 2012, 06:33:42 AM: I dunno, that it's code for something since they can't say what they really want to or whatnot.
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: Tvorsk on May 14, 2012, 02:34:46 PM: Well, Jonas... I'll say this:
I'm generally creeped out by most TFs, inaninmate TFs being one of the creepiest.
But putting my personal feelings aside, it was a very good piece of writing. Not that I'd ever expect you to write any worse than "very good". {;)

PS. I almost said "But putting my personal feelings aside, well written.", but then decided it wouldn't be as funny as it seemed at first. {;)
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: William Swiftfoot on May 14, 2012, 03:08:14 PM: Ah sorry...I just I guess I felt like it would be mean to just say it was creepy or something. Its preety good although, and does a real good job with flow and emotion. All in all excellent.
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: PrincessHotcakes on May 14, 2012, 09:19:18 PM: Oh hey I didn't reply to it here. Gave another comment on it on FA, but I didn't say how much I loooooove this story. You really set out on you goal to show this other side of your Fae well.
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: Virmir on May 22, 2012, 08:12:26 PM: Creepy and cool! A nice contrast to some of the happier plush-TF fans we have around here. *grins* [;)

Great visualization and development of the stages of the transformation as it progresses. A nice horror story edge all around.

That said, I don't like this quite as much as your other fey stories because while you've got a great conflict-- you're missing a resolution. It's the conflict/resolution pair that makes a story in my mind. (Hey, I miss it in half my older stuff too. [;)) I just mention because your others were really strong on plot (which I loved) and I went into this expecting that. But hey, this is nice too!
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: Jonas on May 22, 2012, 10:45:13 PM: Yea, I deliberately left this as more of an implied ending (he basically retreats inwards to keep his sanity) but I'm glad to say my future stories will be much brighter and more concrete.
Title: Re: As it Was Said (New Story! Woo!)
Post by: PrincessToyTime on May 22, 2012, 10:56:52 PM: This is amazingly well-written, very detailed, and a nice darker change to the usually happy and cheery plush TFs that I commonly find. You made the characters really come to life, the flow of the story was nice and consistent to me, and it was just an awesome and wonderful read, it had me sucked in entirely and couldn't stop until it was done. [:P

... Of course, I am kind of biased with toy stories... *shifts eyes* but even so, from an unbiased view, it's a very good read, excellent work Jonas! I always like reading what you write. [:)